Statistically, most New Year’s Resolutions come crashing down sometime in the middle of January, so sometimes I find it ironic that while we glorify God because of His permanence, so much of how we view our lives is about starting over…and over…and over. We look at Salvation as being reborn, we admire the new buds of spring, and every January 1, we make a promise to ourselves to begin again and do better. But before we have any real chance at becoming a better version of ourselves, we might want to focus on one aspect that tends to harm these fresh starts, and that is the baggage we carry of guilt and shame.
Guilt and Shame are lies we choose to believe about the person (you) that God created (you) and loves beyond all measure(again you). These lies take our past sins and rattle them in front of our eyes so that we cannot move forward to become a child of God and fulfill our destinies on this side of Heaven. When we see ourselves as less than how God sees us, we doubt our worthiness to do what God asks of us.
Now let me be clear. God does not see you as perfect. He is omniscient, not delusional. But God sees all of us not only as we are, but as He created us to be. There is an old gospel song that shows how God can view the sinfulness of our lives and still love who we are right now.
In the depths of the sea
Of God’s forgetfulness
Removed as the east is from the west
Far away from all power
And principality
My sins are in the depths of the sea (Hewitt, 1905)
The messiness of our lives is never invisible from God, but He has chosen to separate our sins from Himself and from us. So if we are all right with God, why can’t we move on? The key to this is forgiveness.
The issue of forgiveness is actually a little complicated in that God has developed a cycle for how it works, and, as in most circles, there is no clear starting point. Therefore, we just need to jump on and hold on tight.
Seeking forgiveness from God
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
We can start this cycle by seeking God’s forgiveness for our actions, thoughts, and inactions. To do this, we must confess them. The term ‘confess’ carries quite a bit of weight here. According to The Oxford English Dictionary, (hey, remember I’m an English teacher! No one should be surprised when I whip out the OED), there are 10 definitions for the word, many of which apply to what we are being asked to do here.
-To declare or disclose something which one has kept or allowed to remain secret.
To confess means to make public something that we have chosen to keep private. I probably do not need to go into great detail pointing out that God already knows, so the point is for us to take it off of our hearts and place it on His.
-To acknowledge, concede, grant, or admit for oneself an assertion or claim that might be challenging.
When we confess, we are taking responsibility for what we have done. These are not things that ‘just happened,’ but these are choices we have made.
–To Acknowledge one’s belief as an article of faith
When we confess to God, we are acknowledging our belief that He is God and that our actions are damaging to Him. We are acknowledging that he has authority over us and the power to cleanse our souls.
When we confess to God and meet these requirements, we can rely on Him to make us pure once again. And the really cool part of this is that there is no time limit, no capacity limit, no end point at all. (That is one pretty big sea where God puts our sins). If we confess, we can start anew each and every day.
Forgiving Others
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Eph 4:32
But as I mentioned, this is a cycle of forgiveness. Because God forgave us, we are called upon to forgive everyone who has hurt us. Not only that, in Colossians, Paul writes that we are to forgive others BECAUSE God forgave us. “As the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive” (3:13b). I am sure that you have read somewhere else about the power of forgiveness to those choosing to forgive. It frees us from anger, disappointment, and hatred. But, it is important here that we create our own little lake to throw the sins of our friends and family. We must also forget as well as forgive. We are to use the same process that God has used to forgive us because….well, because it works.
Forgiving Leads to Forgiveness
And Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. Mark 11:25
Now this is where it starts to get complicated. Not only should we forgive because we have been forgiven, but we must also forgive in order to be forgiven. As long as our spirit is affected by our attitude toward how others have treated us, we cannot appeal to God for forgiveness. When Jesus tells us to pray in the Lord’s Prayer, he draws an equation: “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” The quality of the grace we receive from God will only be as great as the grace we are willing to give to others.
Giving Yourself a Break
But there is one more step to this cycle which is not made as clear in the scripture. Though we are promised to be made clean every time we confess our sins, we generally have great difficulty in accepting this tremendous gift. The reasons for this choice are legion, but it tends to primarily focus on the lie we tell ourselves that we do not deserve to be forgiven, that by not living the life God designed for us, that we have disappointed Him. But remember, you are not that powerful. This is an example of the craziness of us telling an omniscient, omnipresent, omnibenevolent, omnipotent creator of the universe and all it contains that He is wrong.
To seek the forgiveness of God and to seek the forgiveness of others, we must first be willing to forgive ourselves. This is not a promise that we will never again go down a path that was not chosen for us, nor is it a plan for us to no longer be hurt and disappointed by others, but it is something miraculous. When we can forgive and been forgiven by our all loving God, and finally, allow us to see ourselves as He does, we are able to clear our own slates just enough for the voice of God to write something new, something hopeful, something which can set us off in a better direction.
